1.56am!

Why oh why am I awake? I have too many TOL dancers prancing about in my head! And then there's SUPERCALAFRAGALISTICEXPEALADOSIOUS! Life has moved on again since my last post... My sabbatical has been and gone. It’s hard to believe I had 4 months off work... It went quickly as I thought it would but I did pack in quite a lot and it was definitely what I needed. To mention just a few of the highlights: Liverpool & Wired Aerial, The Rugby, Brownsea Island, Snettisham, Long walks with Jakie, and relaxed stress free days. It was so nice to do what I wanted when I wanted and to my surprise I didn’t have a single day when I was bored... I also didn’t get any work done! I had planned to give the house an overhaul and finally do the NCDC accounts but once I got into 'doing what I wanted' mode it was too hard to do any real work! It a least proves that it’s not about time but about inclination... It also proved that work or should I say over work is not the root of my depression (I knew that it wasn’t but did wonder if being so manically busy didn’t help) Although it wasn’t all the time I did still have a fair few DD days for no apparent reason, Bloody annoying!!!! Which brings me to my next BIG news...? I have finally taken the plunge and gone on the tabs and omg it has made SUCH a difference... I haven’t had a D day since... I still have days when I feel a bit flat but NOTHING like it was before and best of all I can actually get up in the mornings.. It really had turned things around - Halleluiah!... Jake is still the apple of my eye, and Lloyd my rock. Mum has another boyfriend who’s just a friend and she cant quite figure it out… is he Gay? I don’t think its gonna remain platonic for very much longer… Well sleepy now so better try my bed again…. Until the next time Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Notes on my prev entry....

Just read my prev entry in November and for once I can report that much progress has been made: Homegrown has come and gone and was a storming success and thoughts of my little Chinese Crested are now a reality... Lloyd's health is stable and life is well about to get interesting as I enter a new phase (on sabbatical).  Watch this space.......

P.S. its Monday not Sunday (not sure why the computer cant tell which day it is... maybe its still asleep!)

4.50am

The neighbours have just had an ambulance out...! makes you think how fragile life is... No idea what the trouble is but it must be pretty serious nonbody gets an ambulance out at 3.30am unless its seriouse. Feel I should offer to help in some way (but don't want to be seen as nosey). I hope that they would ask, maybe I'll post a note through the door in the morning. They do have lots of friends that are always around so I'm sure that they will call on them.

Its a windy gusty night. The bedroom door keeps rattling. Downstairs all the sounds are amplified in the quiet of the night. The ticking of the lounge clock, the wind russeling in the trees and the blop blop blop of the wine fermenting. Jake has had a restless night, he was none too keen when cars and people were making a disturbance outside at 3.30am. Good really, he's our miniature guard dog. Tried to smuggle his way onto the bed at least 3 times... He (& I) have successful smuggled him into the bedroom at night. He's much happier there...

5.42am

Tuesday
'Lying in my bed, thoughts running through my head.....'  (Robbie Williams)

May as well get up and make a cup of tea, oh and I know why not start a blog as well! (as you do at 5.42 in the morning...!)
I was lying in my bed thinking about 'Home Grown' and how its all gonna work... I'm not exactly worrying about it just pondering it all and feeling that I need to get on with the planning as its not very far away now...Its very much on my list this week.

Other thoughts are of Chinese Crested Powder Puffs. I so want a doggie but I am still worried about the ties that they will inevitably bring.  Most of the time I'm sure it will be fine but there will always be that occasion when 'the dog' means that you cant go out for the day or have that 2 week holiday in America (or want to have that 2 week holiday in America!). BUT the doggie will be for life and an everyday companion.  Holidays and days out are such a rare occurrence. Anyway I think the long term benefits of a doggie will far out weight the draw backs (well that the theory anyway).

Other worries - none to much apart from life as a whole, Lloyds health and the fact that I've got a bloody cold and feel run down even though I'm not even working very hard at the mo...

Well my feet are cold, my tea has been drunk and my blog created.. time for bed again. Fingers crossed I'll drop off, at least tomorrow isn't to heavy a day.